Broken hearts

At some time in your life you will have had a broken heart.

 

Betrayal, loss, grief.  All these hurt our hearts really badly. The breaking of your heart is sad, but that is not where the real problems lie. Because with peace our hearts can heal from being broken.

Jennifer Sanders

You can find out more about yourself and more about your capacity for self-love. The big problem comes when you “shut off” the part of your heart that is broken, so then you don’t have to feel the pain.

It may give temporary relief as you become numb and protected from the pain for a short while. The pain has to go somewhere and will leak out in different forms into your being.

Imagine your heart is like a beautiful home. Part of your home “dies” when your heart is broken, for example in the garden of your home a wonderful bed of plants you adore all die suddenly.

Now imagine you are boarding over these dead plants with a large wooden box or a dark, opaque glass greenhouse.

 

“There, I can’t see or feel the pain now” you think to yourself, and think it will all simply get better.

But what happens when the box weathers or the greenhouse gets old and rusty and collapses?

 

You have a rotting mass of goo left, all smelly and unpleasant, and maybe even toxic if no light and no air was able to get in as it was sealed away so well!!

Then the healing has to happen anyway, but in a more painful way and when you least expect it! Because it’s hard to predict when “strong winds and floods” of thoughts and emotions will wash away the “protective” barrier.

 

You probably won’t be prepared and it could take you by surprise! It is much better and easier to go into your pain, whilst turning over the soil, putting old things to be recycled in the healthy compost pile to break down naturally. All with the aid of positive light and love to help you feel good about yourself!

Yes it is hard and requires active healing on your part. But you will find it actually easier to do once you get started and find a good “gardener” of the heart to help you 🙂

Sometimes we all need help (me included!) to know how to start, how to keep going and what to do to heal. And to have the abundant source of light and love shone upon us so we remember our beauty and our worth as we do the work.

 

To all you gardeners out there I salute your bravery!

 

If you are ready to heal and want to know more about what can be done to help YOU, then please apply here for one of only 5 free soul healing sessions with me this month.

 

Much love and light as always!

Jennifer Sanders

xxxx

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  512. I’ve watched people very close to me chose to let their garden whither and die. It’s painful to watch because you know they can come out on the other side, but they have to choose to do so. How do you help someone who is so wedded to being miserable that they won’t or can’t help themselves?

    1. I have been thinking about what to reply to you as I wanted to give balanced advice. I would like, of course, to uplift you and help you feel better, but on the other hand I don’t want to not give you advice that is helpful in understanding this situation. You can lead by example and find peace in your life which will inspire them to be able to do the same. However the bottom line here is that if they can’t or won’t help themselves then you cannot change that. My advice is to hold positive thoughts about them, see them as the divine and wonderful beings they are even if they cannot do this. Let go of worry about them, and always send them love. Negative worries or thoughts about them will not help them and will only make you unhappy. I hope this helps! Much love xxxxxxx

  513. Reading this felt good. It felt real and calming to me. The garden metaphor really works as our hearts really are living breathing organs. Your words brought me back in time a few years. I had my heart broken in the worst way. I was ready to dig deep and never come back out. But when I realized what that meant I would be missing out on and how I would end up suffering in the long run – face it I did. It was tough. And some days I wondered if I would make it, but here I am on the other side telling my story and encouraging others to do just that. Push through the mud. Turn the soil as you say and re-plant. (the garden idea really works well)

    1. Thank you so much for sharing your story Kate. It’s lovely to see the heart as a living garden and very beautiful too! You have a big heart that has kept on growing 🙂

  514. A broken heart is devastating, and I wish I’d had your advice when I went through the big break up – it took many years to recover, and I think it is like grief as you say and should be allowed to happen, not get buried under the greenhouse!
    I feel wiser now, and will look for a heart gardener next time!!
    Jacs

    1. Thanks Jacs I’m glad you agree this is helpful advice for getting through the hard time of a broken heart xxx

  515. I recently had my heart broken by a professional friend who “broke up” with me in a vicious way. I was ready to sweep it under the rug and say “whatever” until another friend reminded me of exactly what you are saying. If we don’t deal with it now, it will come back again and again until we do. I’m so grateful for this advice, it is really helpful!

    1. Thank you for sharing this Laura. It can be all sorts of relationships that cause us pain, not just romantic relationships. I wish you lots of love and healing xxx

  516. You illustrated beautifully the harm we do to ourselves when we don’t deal with pain. We make it hard for others to develop relationships with us when we’re intent on not feeling and not processing the past.

    1. Good point Susan, that if we don’t heal then we don’t allow others into our hearts and lives which blocks us forming meaningful relationships fully. Thank you for your comment! Lots of love xxx

  517. Words of wisdom with which I wholeheartedly agree. The saying “time heals” is true but only if we allow ourselves to grieve for what has gone. It can be a painful process but it’s so necessary and it allows our hearts, when healed, to open up to new love and experiences. The analogy between a broken heart and a garden is excellent. What remains of what we have lost can still be put to good use and we can learn from it, and then something fresh and exciting will replace it and grow into something beautiful and refreshing. Lots of love, Jo xxx

    1. Dear Jo,
      Thank-you for your comment, I’m glad you like my garden metaphor 🙂 Our hearts are natural and alive and can heal and grow like a garden can. Old does give way to new experiences as you said above. Loads of love!
      Jenxxx

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